“For what doth it profit a man if a gift is bestowed upon him, and he receive not the gift? Behold, he rejoices not in that which is given unto him, neither rejoices in him who is the giver of the gift.” Doctrine and Covenants 88:33

As I look around and visit with other people, I find that everyone is going through difficult and painful experiences. Our challenges can be disheartening and frightening. It’s normal for the “natural man” in each of us to focus on the negative—it’s easy to find! Heavenly Father wants us to put off the natural man and be happy and hopeful.  Didn’t He send His only begotten Son so we could rejoice and be filled with hope? He also gave us the key to the door of happiness—a commandment to give thanks in all things. 

 “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy might, mind, and strength; and in the name of Jesus Christ thou shalt serve him.

“Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Thou shalt not steal; neither commit adultery, nor kill, nor do anything like unto it.

“Thou shalt thank the Lord thy God in all things.” D&C 59:5–7

I’m not suggesting we pretend we feel differently than we do. It’s important to acknowledge and work through pain and grief.  I’m also not referring to depression or mental illness, but rather habitual focus on the negative, which brings us down. For me, the challenge is to stop dwelling on the sadness in my own life and all around me.  I feel it pressing down on me.  Focusing on the painful parts of life steals my energy, my joy, and my hope. Those thoughts swirl around and around, pulling me deeper and deeper into the darkness. There are people who are sick, suffering, lonely, lost. There are circumstances that are scary and foreign. There are dreams and hearts that are dashed and broken. Mournful and fearful thoughts are powerful and stubborn.  They don’t want to give up their prime real estate in our brains.  We have to forcibly evict them by replacing them with thoughts of beauty and gratitude. There is always more grace than grief.

“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

“And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” Philippians 4:6-8

Think on the good and beautiful things…because this doesn’t come easily to me, I have to intentionally practice it. Practicing takes time and patience, effort and focus. As I exercise the gratitude muscle, which I’ve found takes me from gloom and doom straight to happiness, it gets stronger. I simply cannot think negative thoughts while praising God for the gifts of my children, my grandchildren, my home, and my testimony. I can’t be sad while feeling thanks for beautiful moments on a warm sunny beach with a salty breeze blowing, or a comfy chair and cozy quilt beside a sparkling Christmas tree.

“There is a truism associated with all types of human strength: ‘Use it or lose it.’ When not used, muscles weaken, skills deteriorate, and faith disappears. President Thomas S. Monson, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles at the time, stated: ‘Think to thank. In these three words is the finest capsule course for a happy marriage, a formula for enduring friendship, and a pattern for personal happiness.’” James E. Faust

While working in the temple last week, I experienced overwhelming gratitude.  As I repeated the words describing the blessings we are promised in the ordinances there, I had trouble speaking for the lump in my throat. My eyes filled as I felt the immense love Heavenly Father has for each of His children. Like warm sunshine on a spring day, it shone down on me, filling me with light and joy. Neither my heart nor my mind had even a tiny space for darkness or negativity.

“And thou shalt rejoice in every good thing which the Lord thy God hath given unto thee, and unto thine house…” Deuteronomy 26:11

There are so many things to be thankful for. I tried to write down 1,000 things I was thankful for, but this is pretty tricky, not because there aren’t 1,000 things, but because they overlap and repeat with small variations and because after about 250, I couldn’t remember if I’d already written that one. So I write it again…and again. When I feel low, that list lifts me. It represents all the ways Heavenly Father shows His love for me.

“Piglet noticed that even though he had a very small heart, it could hold rather a large amount of gratitude.” A. A. Milne

Along with the enormous blessings of faith and family, there are numberless small blessings that literally fill every nook and cranny of my life and heart. I love Mr. Putter, a character from the imagination of Cynthia Rylant, one of my favorite children’s authors. One long winter Mr. Putter decides to write a mystery novel, but after much procrastination and writer’s block, he chooses instead to write “Good Things.”  I decided to follow his example and share some of my good things.

• A hand to hold when I’m scared
• Rocking a sleeping baby in a quiet room
• A handmade quilt made just for me
• Popcorn and a favorite movie
• A facetime call from my grandson
• My own private piano concert
• A homecooked meal (not prepared by me!)
• Dad calling me “Darlin’” and Mom calling me “Hon”
• A cup of hot chocolate after Christmas caroling
• Silly moments with my teenager
• A loving and/or hilarious text from a sister or friend
• A cuddle puddle with the grands
• A big hug from one of my big boys
• Grace to get through a rough day

It makes me happy to type this list. I also had great fun reading Disney quotes about gratitude and attitude. There’s some helpful advice here. See if you know who said it. (Answers at the end.) If you have a great quote, share it in the comments! 

“Think of the happiest things…All it takes is faith and trust (oh…and dust). ”

“Just look at the world around you…what more are you looking for?”

“Whistle while you work…Hum a merry tune.”

“Don’t spend your time lookin’ around for something you want that can’t be found.”

“Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.”

I’m working out those gratitude muscles hoping I can be more like Winnie the Pooh (and less like Eeyore).“

“What day is it?” Asked Pooh.

““It’s today!” squeaked Piglet.

“My favorite day” said Pooh.

“Everyone’s situation is different, and the details of each life are unique. Nevertheless, I have learned that there is something that would take away the bitterness that may come into our lives. There is one thing we can do to make life sweeter, more joyful, even glorious.

“We can be grateful!

“It might sound contrary to the wisdom of the world to suggest that one who is burdened with sorrow should give thanks to God. But those who set aside the bottle of bitterness and lift instead the goblet of gratitude can find a purifying drink of healing, peace, and understanding.” Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Quotes: Peter Pan, Sebastian, Snow White, Baloo, Mary Poppins