“You will find some of your greatest joys in your efforts to make your home a place of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and a place that is permeated with love, the pure love of Christ.” Henry B. Eyring

In the gospel of Jesus Christ, we’re taught the ideal of home and family life. We have the ideal in our Heavenly Parents and brother, Jesus Christ. But we live in a telestial world. Though we want celestial, we have to grow and progress, sometimes through painful learning experiences, to reach that potential.

Our current home situations each look a little—or a lot—different. Even our own situations change over the years, I’ve been the daughter in a home with no sons, a young woman married in the temple without children, a woman with many children, a woman with children and extended family sharing my home, a woman with a spouse and some children who have forsaken the beliefs I cherish, a divorced woman, a woman with grown children leaving my home, and a single mother.

My current situation makes these words from a Prophet of God, last week in General Conference, especially comforting:

“Because the Melchizedek Priesthood has been restored, both covenant-keeping women and men have access to ‘all the spiritual blessings of the church’…Every woman and every man who makes covenants with God and keeps those covenants, and who participates worthily in priesthood ordinances, has direct access to the power of God. Those who are endowed in the house of the Lord receive a gift of God’s priesthood power by virtue of their covenant, along with a gift of knowledge to know how to draw upon that power.

“The heavens are just as open to women who are endowed with God’s power flowing from their priesthood covenants as they are to men who bear the priesthood…

“If you are endowed but not currently married to a man who bears the priesthood and someone says to you, ‘I’m sorry you don’t have the priesthood in your home,’ please understand that that statement is incorrect. You may not have a priesthood bearer in your home, but you have received and made sacred covenants with God in His temple. From those covenants flows an endowment of His priesthood power upon you. And remember, if your husband should die, you would preside in your home.” Russell M. Nelson

Your home and family situation may look significantly different from mine. We each have mountains to climb and challenges to face in our ultimate goal of an ideal eternal family. That’s part of the plan. No matter what our home situation is currently, we can have the Spirit and find joy.

“The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives.

“When the focus of our lives is on God’s plan of salvation … and Jesus Christ and His gospel, we can feel joy regardless of what is happening—or not happening—in our lives. Joy comes from and because of Him. … For Latter-day Saints, Jesus Christ is joy!” Russell M. Nelson

Our homes are sacred places. In the Bible dictionary we read that a temple “is the most holy of any place of worship on the earth. Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness.” When we think of the temple as the House of the Lord, and of our homes as temples, we begin to understand the power of the environment we create in our homes.

Because of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ, we know we are children of God. We all belong to His family, and He wants us to return to Him. This naturally means that each member of our family, young or old, has infinite worth, and each deserves to be treated with love, kindness, and respect—no matter what. No matter how they treat us. No matter how they use their agency.

The Lord told us the greatest commandment is to love God, and the second, to love others as ourselves. We put God first. Always. We love and serve Him with all our hearts. This brings the Spirit. Next, we love ourselves and others. We do not let family members treat us badly, and we do not treat them badly, which chases away the Spirit. We remember who we are, and who they are. In my home now, I work hard to set an example with the reminder, “I matter and you matter.” We aim to treat each other with the reverence and respect a child of God deserves.

 “…The ultimate purpose of all we teach is to unite parents and children in faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, that they are happy at home, sealed in an eternal marriage, linked to their generations, and assured of exaltation in the presence of our Heavenly Father.” Boyd K. Packer

“You will best lead by example. Family members and others must see you growing in your own faith in Jesus Christ and in His gospel.” Henry B. Eyring

What we do will always carry more power than what we say. We can’t expect to lift the members of our family if we aren’t in a good place ourselves. I have to be living worthily, and seeking to have the Holy Ghost with me, in order to bring that Spirit into my home. Even then, every child of God has been granted agency, a gift we must honor in ourselves and others, and may not choose to believe or live the way we do. We mustn’t let worry, fear, and grief over loved ones’ choices distract us from our focus on Christ. We continue to love and pray for them, to strengthen our own faith, to follow the Spirit in bearing our testimony to them and inviting them, and then trust in the Lord. He’s told us it’s His work and His glory to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. He can do His work. Our work is to be the very best we can to qualify for the companionship of the Spirit, to love and serve all within our influence, and to never, ever give up. When we’re doing the best we can, we have promises and Heavenly help.

“My promise to you is one that a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles once made to me. I had said to him that because of choices some in our extended family had made, I doubted that we could be together in the world to come. He said, as well as I can remember, ‘You are worrying about the wrong problem. You just live worthy of the celestial kingdom, and the family arrangements will be more wonderful than you can imagine.’” Henry B. Eyring

Our Father in Heaven loves us and wants us to experience joy in this life and for eternity. He provided the way through His Son, Jesus Christ. As we continue to seek the Spirit in our homes, to focus on the Savior, and to show reverence and respect for our family members and homes, we will have Divine Help and enjoy the blessings that come from the companionship of the Holy Ghost, in our homes and in our hearts.